Monday, November 22, 2010

Exile chapter 9 draft 4

Sooooooo, after weeks of procrastination, and working on Splitplane Saga, which is has drawn me in because it is just so very awesome, my agent has given me a swift kick or three and told me to get my lazy butt back to work on Exile. I suppose that it's kind of his job to keep me focused, so I didn't grumble too badly over it. So I've finished Chapter 9 of Exile draft 4 and you can download it at the bottom of this page if you are so inclined.

There are no major changes to this chapter in draft 4, but there were some significant ones in draft 3. In that draft I added a to Silmera's spiel before the village. She talks about Patrick Eamon and one of his recent accomplishments to soften the blow of the news that the South has fallen to the Samirreh, and now only the north remains free of them. This was a necessary addition to tie Patrick's storyline into the main plot, and make sure that the reader knows that even people in the far corner of nowhere have heard of him and his deeds. The other big change is Silmera telling about the boy who made her swords for her, who, if you've read the second draft, turns out to be Fayt Nightfang in his much younger years. This needed to here to give a subtle clue early on as to the identity of the antagonist, and let the reader know that when his identity is finally revealed that I didn't just pull that plot twist out of my back pocket and say "look at this flashy bit of storytelling, bet you didn't see THAT coming BWAAHAAHAA!!!".

Other than that I've continued changing dialog for each character to give them more personality and distinctiveness and continued cleaning up text to make it easier to understand.

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