Exile Chapter 8 Rewrites

I've finished the second draft of Exile chapter 8 and it can be downloaded at the bottom of this page.

This chapter has also changed significantly, however, not so much as the one before it. The general structure of this chapter remains unchanged, as well as the main converstation points. I've added a few things about Silmera's past to make her a more rounded and three dimensional character, as well as more on her motivation and her plans for the Exile bloodline. You need to care about her, and sympathize with her for the ending to have any emotional impact on you at all. In the first draft, who and what Silmera is was veiled and unclear. I thought I was being mysterious with her, but looking back it was a really stupid move. Your main characters and the motives that drive them to do the things that they do should never be a complete mystery to the reader, except in the case where they a mystery to the character as well. She needs to become a more detailed character for this story to be any good, so I'm doing a lot of shoring up her character early in the story so there's a broad foundation for her motives and actions later on.

The first draft of this story ended at 117,352 words.
The second draft of this story is now at 130,979 words.

That's nearly a 14,000 word difference so far, and I have pretty much only just begun.