Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Exile Chater 24 rewrites

I've finished chapter 24 of the second draft of Exile and it can be downloaded at the bottom of this page.

This is the first chapter since chapter 15 that has not either been entirely new material or completely rewritten. Though there has been some dialog added to this conversation, mostly having to do with foreshadowing the new ending and giving a few questions that hopefully readers will want to continue onward to find answers to, most of this chapter remains intact from the first draft. I did add some more to the end of this chapter dealing with Silmera's horror at what's happened, and the destruction she sees around her. Before I didn't really describe what happened, now I'm trying to hit you hard with the graphic detail of what has happened so that you can better feel Silmera's pain and self loathing over having been the one to call it down on the first people to allow her in and accept her for who she is that she has ever met in her entire thousand years of life. In the first draft Silmera was somewhat indifferent over having brought Fayt Stain to the village, but now she's heartbroken over it, which is, in my opinion, the normal human reaction to having caused so much death and destruction.

I've also introduced the antagonist of the story, Fayt Nightfang, much earlier than I did in the first draft. He's actually been talked about quite a bit in the second draft, but this is the first time that he's named, and, of course, his identity is something of a secret at this point in the story as that is one of the plot twists in the end. While I was writing the first draft I came up with the idea for this character when I was almost done, and so he only appeared in the ending. I've decided not to have him make appearances until the ending still, but have left several clues as to who he is and who he was throughout the story so that he doesn't just show up and say, hey, I'm the bad guy, now die. Everything that is happening was actually planned out by him seventy years ago, and he's worked very hard and made many sacrifices to get what he wants up to now. His part in the second draft will be greatly expanded, and his plans are far deeper than simply convert the Exile to our cause so that the Samirreh need never fear him as they were before. He wants something, and he'll stop at nothing to get it. He holds nothing sacred. Buuuuuuut, if you wanna know what, you'll have to wait for me to finish writing it, because I'm not about to give away all of the plot twists and ending =P

The first draft of this story ended at 117,352 words.
The second draft is currently at 181,903 words.

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